Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
Here's some Toko
So I can ski with You!
Everyone is familiar with the symbolism of roses of different colors, but why not "Say It with Wax?" Just follow the temperature chart to pick a wax to match the warmth of your feelings. With Toko, it's simple: Blue, Red or Yellow. Swix and Solda allow for more colorful bouquets and a wider range of feelings. Here's a quick guide to the Meaning of Wax:
BLUE: Freeze Your Ass Off Cold
In nature, blue roses are rare if not impossible to find, and in skiing, it's rarely cold enough to use Blue. Hence, Blue wax honors the rarity of your partner. Or the fact that they are impossible to live with. Who else would track wax shavings all over the house, or put up with them?
VIOLET: Really Really Cool
Violet wax is used to express feelings of love at first sight. This wax should be given to someone you think is really really cool, someone you wish to know a lot better, someone who enchants you as they double pole past in a lycra body suit.
With its blazing energy, Orange is the embodiment of enthusiasm, passion and desire. Give Orange wax to a partner who wears their heart rate monitor to bed and sleeps with their skis so that the wax will saturate the bases. You only hope that they are half as passionate about you.
RED (PINK): Hot
Red wax is for warm temperatures and warm feelings and should be given to someone you think is hot. It is a symbol of love and beauty. Red wax means "I love you" or "I would ski through a blizzard to see you," while Pink says "You have a beautiful and elegant V-2."
The bright, sunny color of Yellow evokes a feeling of joy and friendship. Yellow wax says "You are my most favorite ski buddy and nothing makes me happier than crust cruising with you on perfect corn snow on a bluebird day!"
Saying it with wax is a little more complex than with flowers because, not only does color have meaning, but so does Fluorocarbon content:
Hydrocarbon (no Fluoro) - "See you at the mountain."
Low Fluoro ($) - "Let's do Ollie's and Leslie's together."
High Fluoro ($$) - "Can I come over and wax your skis and rill them for you?"
Swix Cera F Powder ($$$) - "Yowza! Meet me at the warming hut at midnight, wearing nothing but silk-weight Capilene, baby, and I will sprinkle some on!"
WINTERFEST RAIL JAM
If you're looking for a good demonstration on how to effectively, but not necessarily safely, remove aforementioned wax, you might want to check out the Liberty Bank WinterFest Rail Jam. In the spirit of full disclosure, the festival is put on by the Source's sister company, Lay It Out. But personal bias notwithstanding and with journalistic integrity largely intact we can tell you that this year's event is going for broke - hopefully in a less than literal way - with a freestyle rail complex for which the term "rail" really doesn't do justice. Think X Games material for this setup, which we're told by highly placed sources is one of the largest off-mountain setups in the Western U.S. (Riders will drop in from a reportedly, and somewhat ridiculously high, three-story deck).
The jamming starts off at 5:30 p.m. Friday for skiers at the newly minted WinterFest grounds in the Old Mill. Knuckle draggers take center stage on Saturday night in the same time slot. The format will have a large field of skiers and riders competing for five finalist slots on Friday and Saturday night respectively. There's a strong incentive to go big in the final round with a $1,500 first place prize on the line. Runners up will each receive $500.
In other WinterFest news Alpine Physical Therapy and NW Brain and Spine are sponsoring Elite Sprint Cross Country Ski races from 5-7 p.m. Friday night and 2:30-5:30 p.m. on Saturday.
Also, look for ski and snowshoe demos throughout the weekend. Gearheads can also get into the act with kids snowmobile demos (no, that's not a typo) and rides Friday, Saturday and Sunday. For a complete rundown of WinterFest activities check out the festival website, www.bendwinterfest.com.