BEATS—The SHE behind Smasheltooth is a Santa Cruz-based producer who mixes dance beats with hip-hop and inner-city raps until "going stoopid doo-doo dumb on the stage." Seriously, though, she's a professional, following in the footsteps of Girl Talk. Deep bass and musical butter also provided by The Pirate, Lyfe and Thumbprint Collective. 21+. No cover. 9 p.m. The Liquid Lounge, 70 NW Newport Ave.
The King of Napa Valley
THEATER—Written by a Napa Valley native, this play is an insider's look at operating a winery. It's not all glory—in fact, it's often cutthroat, even among family members. There WILL BE wine tastings at the theater during the shows. $18/adults, $15/students and seniors. 7:30 p.m. Thursdays-Saturdays, 3 p.m. Sunday matinees. Through March 30. 2nd Street Theater, 220 NE Lafayette.
ROCK—Want to know just how big this young band is? They've recorded with Gordon Raphael, The Strokes' former producer. In case you're still unclear, The Strokes are one of the best garage rock bands since Iggy Pop and the Stooges, so yeah. Go see this San Francisco band. It's a free show! 10 p.m. The Astro Lounge, 939 NW Bond St.
Monster X Tour
friday 15 and saturday 16
BIG TRUCKS—As far as we can tell, the Monster X Tour is basically WWF wrestling but with big-ass trucks instead of greased-up muscleheads. Even the names of the gas hogs are reminiscent of the 'roided-up ring performers: Project X, Ballistic, Razin Kane. This is going to be awesome!!! $5-$18. 7:30 p.m. Hooker Creek Event Center, 3800 SW Airport Way, Redmond.
Tom Scott & California Express Jazz
friday 15 and saturday 16
MUSIC—Of all the Jazz at the Oxford series acts, this one is probably the most special. Saxophonist Tom Scott wrote themes for "Starsky and Hutch" and "Family Ties." He's recorded with The Grateful Dead, Pink Floyd and Frank Sinatra. He's won three Grammys and is one of the more connected musicians to play a show in Bend—ever. $49. 5 and 8 p.m. The Oxford Hotel, 10 NW Minnesota Ave.
Five Pint Mary and Bend Fire Pipes and Drums!
friday 15 - sunday 17
CELTIC—At least two Bend bands are keeping exhausting schedules this St. Patty's weekend. Find Five Pint Mary here—Friday: 8pm, Kelly D's; Saturday: 9pm, Astro; Sunday: 10am, Deschutes; 1pm, McMenamins; 9pm, GoodLife. On Sunday, the bagpipe bros who make up Bend Fire Pipes and Drums are playing at least NINE shows. They'll be downtown all day. Flip to CULTURE for sweet St. Patty's How-to. No cover.
AUTHOR—Sure, author and longtime raft guide Jo Deurbrouck won a National Outdoor Book Award for "Anything Worth Doing," her bio of two adventurous river rats, but what really impressed us were the glowing reviews from her peers—she earned accolades from the great David James Duncan as well as the senior editor at Outside Magazine. Free. 6 p.m. Tumalo Creek & Kayak, 805 SW Industrial Way.
CAJUN—These guys won a Grammy for Best Traditional Folk Album in 1997. Then in 2009, they won best Cajun album at the New Orleans Jazz and Heritage Festival. They've played on soundtracks for several movies. Hell, even Garrison Keillor says these guys are the best Cajun band in the world. Who are we to disagree? $19. 7:30 p.m. Tower Theatre, 835 NW Wall St.
ENVIRONMENT—When it doesn't snow the forests of the Cascades get drier faster. Drier forests mean wildfires get hotter faster. And this is where the climate change rubber meets the road for Central Oregon. The snowpack in our mountains has been declining. Come see what this means for us. 5:30 p.m. Three Creeks Brewery, 721 S Desperado Ct, Sisters.
Last to Leave
MUSIC—[To be said in 1960s game-show voice]: If you like Larry and His Flask you'll LUUUV Reno's Last to Leave! They're an aggressive Americana band with more oomph than your daddy's Thunderbird! See 'em with local heroes Third Seven and Harley Bourbon! 21+. $5. 8 p.m. The Horned Hand, 507 NW Colorado Ave.