Opinion » Letters to the Editor

Reborn A Liberal

Being a conservative, I am ashamed by the findings of W. Lamberson, April 29, that found people of my ilk are responsible for food, water and medicine shortages on the planet.

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Being a conservative, I am ashamed by the findings of W. Lamberson, April 29, that found people of my ilk are responsible for food, water and medicine shortages on the planet. Then, worst of all, responsible for depleting the ozone layer, causing global warming and deforestation. What chumps!

Being a conservative, it was required of me to be the most openly bigoted, racist, sexist, earth plundering gay basher I could be.

I'm finally ready to change my ways. I want to become a liberal.

Being a liberal, I too now believe that my country owes me health care and should look after me from cradle to grave.

Being a liberal, I now believe that my government, from Washington to the Bend City Council knows what is better for me than I do.

Being a liberal, I finally see the conservatives for the dumb ass hicks that they are (name calling and stereotyping is required now that I am a liberal).

I am ready to bask in the glow of liberal enlightenment.

- Mike Prank, Bend

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