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This Fresh Straight Poop Is Guaranteed E. coli Free

Take a sniff of this week's poop.



Monday, June 6

And now, Weinergate! A weepy Rep. Anthony D. Weiner (D-NY) admits Tweeting gross photo of himself to woman, apologizes, but says he won't resign ... Meanwhile House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi calls for ethics probe and right-wing gadfly Andrew Breitbart leaks what he says are more Weiner photos ... It wasn't the sprouts: Bean sprouts blamed for Germany's E. coli outbreak exonerated by lab tests ... Things are clouding up: Steve Jobs introduces Apple's new iCloud service, says: "We are going to move the digital hub, the center of your digital life, into the cloud" ... If they holler, let 'em go: Scientists at the European Organisation for Nuclear Research manage to catch 300 atoms of anti-matter and hold them for 16 minutes.

Tuesday, June 7

A woman spurned: Former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher cool to suggestion that she meet Sarah Palin. "That would be belittling for Margaret. Sarah Palin is nuts," says Thatcher aide ... Might get his wish: NATO drops more than 60 bombs on Tripoli, Libya, virtually flattening Muammar Qaddafi's compound; "We welcome death," says Qaddafi in radio address ... The Palinuts are coming! Wikipedia entry on Paul Revere changed, apparently by Sarah Palin supporters trying to make it jibe with Palin's version of his ride ... Carving it up: Oregon Legislature appears close to deal on redistricting for first time since 1981 ... Spare those honkers: Citizens show up at Bend Metro Park and Recreation District board meeting to plead for lives of Drake Park geese.

Wednesday, June 8

Weinergate, cont.: Blurry photo purported to show Anthony Weiner's penis surfaces on the Web ... Meanwhile word leaks out that Mrs. Weiner, aka Huma Abedin, is pregnant with their first child ... My mother the cow? Chinese scientists say they've genetically modified cows to produce human breast milk. Something about this just screams "hoax" ... Coin-operated, maybe? Attempting to get a grip on Switzerland's sex industry, officials in Zurich announce plan to set up "sex boxes" in parts of city ... Welcome home, soldier, that'll be $200: Delta Air Lines apologizes for charging troops returning from Afghanistan $200 each for extra baggage ... Red Bull gives you wings out of jail: Stephen Coffeen, 42, of Florida ruled not guilty by reason of insanity in slaying of 83-year-old father after defense says he became mentally unbalanced from drinking Red Bull. If you ask me, that's a lotta bull.

Thursday, June 9

Deserting the sinking Newt? Campaign manager Rob Johnson and slew of other top aides resign en masse from Newt Gingrich's presidential campaign; he vows to stay in race ... In the crosshairs: Senior NATO official tells CNN that NATO is indeed trying to kill Muammar Qaddafi. Which seems kind of obvious ... Trying to top Arizona: Gov. Robert Bentley of Alabama signs harshest anti-immigrant law in nation. Begging the question: Who'd want to migrate to Alabama? ... News from the animal beat: Leona Helmsley's dog Trouble, who inherited $12 million from the tax-dodging hotel queen and reportedly was as mean and nasty as she was, dies at age 12 ... Encounters with cougars in two Bend neighborhoods have locals jumpy again ... European Union threatens to fine France more than $12 million for not doing enough to protect endangered Great Hamster of Alsace, which sounds like something from a horror movie but really is a cute, furry little fella.

Friday, June 10

It just gets worse: Embattled Anthony Weiner admits having Twitter conversation with 17-year-old girl in Delaware, but says there wasn't anything smutty ... June Swoon continues: Stock market drops 1.4 percent, sending Dow below 12,000 for first time since March ... Wasn't the tornado bad enough? Residents of Joplin, MO coming down with rare, sometimes deadly fungus called murcomycosis; three deaths confirmed ... Yes, it was the sprouts: Scientists check again, discover that previously exonerated sprouts really were to blame for E. coli outbreak that killed 31 in Germany.

Saturday, June 11

Rehab-bound: Anthony Weiner announces he's taking leave of absence from Congress, going into treatment to become "healthier person" ... Meanwhile, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi says he should resign ... Another one bites the dust: Fazul Abdullah Mohammed, Al Qaeda operative believed responsible for embassy bombing that killed 220 in East Africa in 1998, reported gunned down by Somali troops ... On the mend: Rep. Gabrielle Giffords, shot in head by loony in Arizona six months ago, set to be moved to outpatient care ... Happy belated birthday, Liz: Queen Elizabeth II marks 85th birthday, which actually was April 21 but traditionally is celebrated in June because April weather in England is caca.

Sunday, June 12

Exit the Weiner? Anthony Weiner reportedly considering resignation after new semi-nude photos released, more leading Democrats call for him to step down ... Bit of a letdown: "Amina Arraf," alias "Gay Girl in Damascus," whose supposed plight stirred world after report she'd been kidnaped by Syrian security forces, turns out to be a straight white American blogger living in Scotland ... File under "Well, duh": CIA Chief Leon Panetta says he thinks there's collusion between Pakistani officials and insurgents staging attacks in Afghanistan ... You can make book on it: "Book of Mormon" cops nine Tony Awards including Best Musical; Matt Stone and Trey Parker to get a little richer ... In other news, NBA playoffs finally end; some team from Texas wins.

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